> be me
> loser male and autistic as fuck
> The one friend I have invites me to a party
> Go there and stand by myself watching them have fun
> qt 7/10 comes over to me, starts talking
> Somehow manage to not be autistic and hold the conversation
> Offers to take me on a drive
Someone complete it for me I’m bored
Gonna start over cuz that one's boring:
>Be me
>Autistic af teen, Christian and love cars
>Only friend invites me to a party
>Didn't really want to go because of social ineptitude, but it's this or playing Need for Speed all night again
>Alone at party when someone comes over
>Some emo looking kid
>Both akward but we make it work
>Eventually he mentions he has a car
>I love cars and my interest peaks
>He offers me a drive
>On the drive he starts acting strange
>Makes dirty jokes about sex, but i turn the other cheek and laugh out of kindness
>Suddenly he parks the car in a dark and secluded spot
>Oshit.jpeg
>He offers to suck my dick
>The realization hits that this was all a gay setup
>Break down crying, my social akward ass can't say no and I will be abandoned by the love of god after today's events
>Somehow manage to convince Twink to take me home
>Later got told it was actually a girl, not a Twink emo
>Mfw (some dumb pepe pic)
> be me
> get home from my vasectomy
> hear moaning and slapping coming from my wife's room
> must be Chad again
> know they would want privacy, sit down at my computer
> log onto reddit and open /r/greentext
> read a funny greentext from le 4chins and chuckle as I listen to my wife begging for the genes I can't give her
> think of a convoluted way in which I can relate homosexuality and falsehood to the events in the greentext
> suck the cheeto dust off my fingers as I begin to type my masterpiece in the comment section
> Fake: female involvement
> Gay: dick sucking
> giggle as I imagine the intellectuals of leddit perusing my incredibly witty and original comment
> hear my wife moan with ecstasy as Chad floods her fertile womb with his seed
> it's been a good day
> i'll get lots of upvotes for my impressive contribution to internet culture, and Chad might even let me eat his cum out of my wife's pussy if he finds my comment funny enough
As a guy
I don’t like being treated like a sexuel object
I much prefer relationships and Iv had several girls do this to me.
Yes I guess I’m lucky but I’m still lonly and all they do to get my attention is treat me like some sex object
“I like you let’s fuck”
Why can’t you just be romantic wtf is wrong sith you peoppe
Pussy is great and all but it’s really not the be all end all of happiness. Can you not think of one single thing that could be better?
>!Heroin. The answers heroin.!<
I’m not coping with it at all been abused fucking constantly literally been raped and all I get is people like you
Acting like it’s all good
You have no fucking idea
> be me
> get home from my vasectomy
> hear moaning and slapping coming from my wife's room
> must be Chad again
> know they would want privacy, sit down at my computer
> log onto reddit and open /r/greentext
> read a funny greentext from le 4chins and chuckle as I listen to my wife begging for the genes I can't give her
> think of a convoluted way in which I can relate homosexuality and falsehood to the events in the greentext
> suck the cheeto dust off my fingers as I begin to type my masterpiece in the comment section
> Fake: Fake
> Gay: Gay
> giggle as I imagine the intellectuals of leddit perusing my incredibly witty and original comment
> hear my wife moan with ecstasy as Chad floods her fertile womb with his seed
> it's been a good day
> i'll get lots of upvotes for my impressive contribution to internet culture, and Chad might even let me eat his cum out of my wife's pussy if he finds my comment funny enough
Once upon a time, I was a freshman in college. My buddy’s little brother was a senior, so he invited us to a house party. It was high school, kinda fun. But it got a bit rowdy, so we leave. As we’re driving out of the neighborhood, cops are pulling in. Suddenly friends brother calls us to come pick him up 2 neighborhoods away. So we grab him and some girl I hadn’t met. I drop off buddy and his brother. Ask the girl where she lives, and she says she wants to drive around for a minute. Tells me to pull over in this new neighborhood that’s still under construction so she can smoke a cigarette. Soon as we park she says “do you want me to blow you?” And I didn’t break down crying. When she was done, she said “ok I live 2 blocks over tee hee” saw her 5 years later at a wedding.
> be me
> get home from my vasectomy
> hear moaning and slapping coming from my wife's room
> must be Chad again
> know they would want privacy, sit down at my computer
> log onto reddit and open /r/greentext
> read a funny greentext from le 4chins and chuckle as I listen to my wife begging for the genes I can't give her
> think of a convoluted way in which I can relate homosexuality and falsehood to the events in the greentext
> suck the cheeto dust off my fingers as I begin to type my masterpiece in the comment section
> Fake: OP didn't break down crying.
> Gay: OP got in a car with other dudes.
> giggle as I imagine the intellectuals of leddit perusing my incredibly witty and original comment
> hear my wife moan with ecstasy as Chad floods her fertile womb with his seed
> it's been a good day
> i'll get lots of upvotes for my impressive contribution to internet culture, and Chad might even let me eat his cum out of my wife's pussy if he finds my comment funny enough
Waiting for u/Cala-Best-Girl to farm comment karma off another greentext
Honestly just block them, the world is suddenly a better place
I can’t believe I hadn’t thought of that yet, what a nice change it will be.
I agree so much. I usually don't block people, but this was an exception. Blocking that degenerate made scrolling r/greentext so much more enjoyable
Says the buzz lightyear pfp
Yes😎
Block exists so that you never have to see any Reddit posts from awkwardtheturtle or Ghislaine Maxwell ever again. It makes life so much better
just blocked them. Thanks
Ignoring a tumour does no one any good.
Why? They don’t seem bad
Account is 263 days old and has 544k comment karma like bro needs to walk outside for once
And he'll still pretend his 400lbs ass gets women
Isn't commenting about u/Cala-Best-Girl just farming karma?
Yeah, but its reddit , what do you expect from these dumb fucks? They care more about getting shitty internet points than getting a life
I guess. It wasn’t intentional it was just to address the fact that it’s been happening.
Farming karma on reddit? Unheard of
Normally I never peak into the comments on this thread as it’s very stupid half the time but this peaks my interest. Can someone tell me the story?
A 6 month old account with 500,000 comment Karma who shows up early to greentexts posted here and makes “le funny comment”
I have that account blocked for some reason
Don’t block them. If the comment rises on merit then so be it, if it gets downvoted then that’s fine too.
Me too
What does that even mean
They put shit comments in almost every green text post
It's the ghost that haunts this sub.
Let’s guess, probably a woman bad take?
Yes, very bad take
Bruh why doesn't anyone offer me blowjobs?
Join me, maybe on my birthday? And she spits.
When is that?
During the summer.
Damn alr hmu
Not unless that sentence is preceding, for 50 usd.
20 USD if you're a goth chick
Ill blow you bro
Aww finally.
Ah never mind you literal clown nft dude
Lmfao damn okay
Try showering
Man I do but that doesn't seem to be enough.
Same tbh
He was probably sexually assaulted or something as a kid.
I think its more likely he thought he made a genuine connection with a chick and then she just went full hoe and ruined the image he built in his head
I don't think someone would cry over that, they would more likely start the "better than thou" act.
Wanting a genuine xonnection with someone doesn't make you an egotist
Why can’t we have blowjobs and genuine connections at the same time?
I genuinely connected my penis with op's mother's mouth
You can, but imo I've learned sex feels pretty gross afterwards if you don't do it with someone you love
I'm on this wavelength as well hence my comment; it's different strokes for different folks
Who hurt you?
You'll need to be more specific.
Who the fuck thinks like this lol
he prob came in his pants when she offered
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OP is a """""girl"""""
Foid moment.
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Sorry bro, hope you find someone that accepts you for who you are
isn’t this the opposite perspective of another greentext?
> be me > loser male and autistic as fuck > The one friend I have invites me to a party > Go there and stand by myself watching them have fun > qt 7/10 comes over to me, starts talking > Somehow manage to not be autistic and hold the conversation > Offers to take me on a drive Someone complete it for me I’m bored
Gonna start over cuz that one's boring: >Be me >Autistic af teen, Christian and love cars >Only friend invites me to a party >Didn't really want to go because of social ineptitude, but it's this or playing Need for Speed all night again >Alone at party when someone comes over >Some emo looking kid >Both akward but we make it work >Eventually he mentions he has a car >I love cars and my interest peaks >He offers me a drive >On the drive he starts acting strange >Makes dirty jokes about sex, but i turn the other cheek and laugh out of kindness >Suddenly he parks the car in a dark and secluded spot >Oshit.jpeg >He offers to suck my dick >The realization hits that this was all a gay setup >Break down crying, my social akward ass can't say no and I will be abandoned by the love of god after today's events >Somehow manage to convince Twink to take me home >Later got told it was actually a girl, not a Twink emo >Mfw (some dumb pepe pic)
solid ending
>makes me suck her dick >cry
unexpected
Fake: female involvement Gay: dick sucking
> be me > get home from my vasectomy > hear moaning and slapping coming from my wife's room > must be Chad again > know they would want privacy, sit down at my computer > log onto reddit and open /r/greentext > read a funny greentext from le 4chins and chuckle as I listen to my wife begging for the genes I can't give her > think of a convoluted way in which I can relate homosexuality and falsehood to the events in the greentext > suck the cheeto dust off my fingers as I begin to type my masterpiece in the comment section > Fake: female involvement > Gay: dick sucking > giggle as I imagine the intellectuals of leddit perusing my incredibly witty and original comment > hear my wife moan with ecstasy as Chad floods her fertile womb with his seed > it's been a good day > i'll get lots of upvotes for my impressive contribution to internet culture, and Chad might even let me eat his cum out of my wife's pussy if he finds my comment funny enough
Tbh getting offered a blowjob without even having kissed or anything before is kinda sad
As a guy I don’t like being treated like a sexuel object I much prefer relationships and Iv had several girls do this to me. Yes I guess I’m lucky but I’m still lonly and all they do to get my attention is treat me like some sex object “I like you let’s fuck” Why can’t you just be romantic wtf is wrong sith you peoppe
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Pussy is great and all but it’s really not the be all end all of happiness. Can you not think of one single thing that could be better? >!Heroin. The answers heroin.!<
Or cocaine
That is also an option. Really any decent drug is better than pussy 99% of the time.
Honesty don’t give a shit they are not worth my time and hey don’t offer me shit anyway better to work on myself than waste my time with a time waster
[удалено]
Whatever dude my life doesn’t revolve around petty shit grow up degenerate Better to improve ones self that waste your time
[удалено]
I’m not coping with it at all been abused fucking constantly literally been raped and all I get is people like you Acting like it’s all good You have no fucking idea
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>cringe >commie Many such cases
Based
You have no idea bro. None
This story sounds familiar. Almost like the other half of a greentext from a while back.
You really jumped to “blowjob” immediately?
Fake: Fake Gay: Gay
> be me > get home from my vasectomy > hear moaning and slapping coming from my wife's room > must be Chad again > know they would want privacy, sit down at my computer > log onto reddit and open /r/greentext > read a funny greentext from le 4chins and chuckle as I listen to my wife begging for the genes I can't give her > think of a convoluted way in which I can relate homosexuality and falsehood to the events in the greentext > suck the cheeto dust off my fingers as I begin to type my masterpiece in the comment section > Fake: Fake > Gay: Gay > giggle as I imagine the intellectuals of leddit perusing my incredibly witty and original comment > hear my wife moan with ecstasy as Chad floods her fertile womb with his seed > it's been a good day > i'll get lots of upvotes for my impressive contribution to internet culture, and Chad might even let me eat his cum out of my wife's pussy if he finds my comment funny enough
I say I don’t want to be treated like a sexuel object and suddenly I have you acting like I should be Wtf is wrong with you
[удалено]
Mah don’t care you shown who you are.... Nasty piece of work. Simple as
Once upon a time, I was a freshman in college. My buddy’s little brother was a senior, so he invited us to a house party. It was high school, kinda fun. But it got a bit rowdy, so we leave. As we’re driving out of the neighborhood, cops are pulling in. Suddenly friends brother calls us to come pick him up 2 neighborhoods away. So we grab him and some girl I hadn’t met. I drop off buddy and his brother. Ask the girl where she lives, and she says she wants to drive around for a minute. Tells me to pull over in this new neighborhood that’s still under construction so she can smoke a cigarette. Soon as we park she says “do you want me to blow you?” And I didn’t break down crying. When she was done, she said “ok I live 2 blocks over tee hee” saw her 5 years later at a wedding.
Fake: OP didn't break down crying. Gay: OP got in a car with other dudes.
> be me > get home from my vasectomy > hear moaning and slapping coming from my wife's room > must be Chad again > know they would want privacy, sit down at my computer > log onto reddit and open /r/greentext > read a funny greentext from le 4chins and chuckle as I listen to my wife begging for the genes I can't give her > think of a convoluted way in which I can relate homosexuality and falsehood to the events in the greentext > suck the cheeto dust off my fingers as I begin to type my masterpiece in the comment section > Fake: OP didn't break down crying. > Gay: OP got in a car with other dudes. > giggle as I imagine the intellectuals of leddit perusing my incredibly witty and original comment > hear my wife moan with ecstasy as Chad floods her fertile womb with his seed > it's been a good day > i'll get lots of upvotes for my impressive contribution to internet culture, and Chad might even let me eat his cum out of my wife's pussy if he finds my comment funny enough
This is so clearly guy Anon telling the story from the girl’s pov. No woman 1) refers to herself as a female 2) is on 4chan.
I've read this exact greentext from the guy's perspective
Plot twist: Anon was the guy and he wrote this thru the chick's perspective
What a fucking loser lmao