T O P
Ayankananaman

Damn, I heard it in my head, laugh included


conjunctivious

The only thing I want is to hang out with my boys, and it'll be pretty gay if I wash my boys.


Child_of_the_Abyss

Don't threaten me with a good time now.


apothioternity

*Show me a good time, jack!*


Dklett

MEMORIES BROKEN


SweeBoyse

Must be a popular dog


-YELDAH

You should wash your boys regularly to decrease the chances of infection!


boogers19

And stank.


Fire_Tide

Not if you say *no homo*


Impossible-Review-27

It's gay not to wash your homies.


hayleyrose18

Take my poor girl award 🥇


benk1988

Well thanks


-YELDAH

Why’s the award so dirty? Oh I get it


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alx1789

woooosh


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Nightmare_Gerbil

Comment stealing bot.


wind4air

Then god skeletor de-powers so they can *bone*, but evil lyn steals his ~~hoody~~ powers and becomes the BBEG. ...I might still be butt hurt over that bad sequel.


benk1988

Long story short tho wash ur pussy a lot haha


wind4air

Feels good too, not sure why it's a problem for some.


maddie1358

I think the bigger issue here is y’all don’t clean your own ass because you think it’s weird/ gay


baallsdeep69

Of course it's gay. So is showering or just touching yourself anywhere, that's basically touching a man and that's gay. Touching girls is also gay bc you're basically touching someone who likes dicks and that's gay. Miss me with that gay shit.


oliverjoy69420

Hell yeah. The lack of bidets in America makes me eternally sad. Under seat bidet attachment is one of my most prized possessions. Not to mention the guys who think that cleaning your ass even in the shower is gay.


ctoatb

I always make sure to shit before I take a shower. That way I can give myself a proper deep clean


maddie1358

The latter part was mostly what I was referring to since I’m an female American, but I have to agree with the first part as well. I dated an Indian man once that had a bidet, bought one for myself and it’s a blessing 😂


oliverjoy69420

Oh yeah, I figured. Absolute game changer on both parts, anyway. Though, I've had maaany dudes question my love of bidets, saying that it seems pretty gay to have water spray up your ass 🙄.


Idcatallo

I only poop at home and shower after, I was gonna get a shower anyway might as well feel clean after a poop too


roachRancher

Replace your shower head with one on a hose. It's not as convenient as a bidet, but it works wonders.


benk1988

Spraying ur asshole is kinda gay haha idk just weird


oliverjoy69420

Nah bruh. If you get shit on your hands, you gonna just use a paper towel to get it off? I'd hope you wash your hands with water at least.


benk1988

Wait hold on so it either hands or bidet? Like what about toilet paper?


oliverjoy69420

Basically, I have a bidet under my toilet seat. After I launch the chocolate rockets, I spray the bidet to clean off my chocolate starfish, and use toilet paper to dry it off. Toilet paper alone just spreads the dookie around, leading to dingleberries and having to wipe a million times for the clean wipe that means you aren't gonna add race stripes to your man panties. With a bidet, it's spray once, and wipe to dry. They have dryer attachments on the fancy ones too, so tp optional there.


benk1988

What if one spray isn’t enough? Like how intense is the spray? I’m not joking real question I’d get one it seems intense haha is there a few ash button?


oliverjoy69420

I gotcha. Don't mind explaining. At least on mine, the spray is pretty strong (controllable, but it ranges from magikarp splash to blast your ass off gyrados hydro beam). If it doesn't take it all off after spraying it for a little bit, you'll wipe and still see a bit of your ass mud on the tp. Spray again. Most of the time, that's unnecessary though. Rarely, after a good night of taco bell, will I need the double spray, and if I wasn't using the bidet, I'd be making early covid me cringe anyway from how senselessly I waste my tp.


benk1988

Ok deadass loved ur explanation hhaha I want one kind but still kinda scared haha


oliverjoy69420

It's a bit of a shock at first, especially if your cold water runs hella cold, and you don't have a hot water line hooked up to it, but once you get used to it, you'll walk away feeling superior to all the lesser people with their dirty bungholes.


ColShvotz

Just spray your hole. It’s not complicated.


benk1988

Shut the fuck up


HoneyChilliPotato7

Cleaning yourself properly is Gay?


benk1988

Where are u from that the bidet is a thing?


oliverjoy69420

I'm a convert from spending time in East Asia for work. Japanese style toilets convinced me I needed them back home too.


benk1988

U from the us? Doesn’t a lot of Asia also shit in a hole?


null_check_failed

You are saying your shit lies around on floor ? You know hole connects toilets to sewer pipes or something ? Too bad you don't have that yet


Balauronix

Bidet. $35. Invest in one and you can toss each other's salads all you want. I'm not even joking


ProfessionalTurnip93

Straight to the point yup


SnooRevelations2041

Poop is still poop if you wash it


Frency2

\*bidet has entered the chat\*


inumnoback

Don’t make me get He-Man!


Alternative_Ad9495

Chad Skeletor


Western-Pilot-3924

Here take my poor man's gold # 🏅


Florian085

maybe you just date the wrong ones


Idcatallo

Wash what?


yourpardon

My dog


Idcatallo

Must be a popular dog


RepresentativeSpot23

Women just want the one thing tbh


IareJumpus

You said it would change my life, but it only changed the smell in the room smh


DirkDieGurke

Correct.


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benk1988

Said no one ever


Andre4kthegreengiant

Napoleon, in a letter to his wife


robmac550

You're righty right. Ive known this little nugget of info since reading about it as a teenager. Napoleon liked his "meals" extra spicy lol.


alterector

You need Jesús


chowder-hound

Maybe Jesus needs some stinky pussy…. Just sayin


CHM11moondog

He turns it into rosewater and chocolate flavored...


chowder-hound

Boom!


oliverjoy69420

*pffft* Uh oh 🙈 Stinky! Poop 💩 hahahahaha 😂 Poopies 💩 Funny poopies alalalahahaha 😂😂 Funny poop 💩🤣 Poop funny 🤣 Weeeeee 😆😆 Haha yay more poopy💩 Good poopy 👍 Poopy funny 😆 hahahahaha 🤣 poo 💩 poo 💩 poo💩poo💩poo💩poo💩poo💩 funny 😂 Yay fun poop 😆💩 hehehe poo 💩 Poopy 💩 yay poop make me happy 😊 happy 😊 happy 😊 hahahahahahaaa 🤣 uh oh 🙈 I think I made a poopy 💩 Poop in pants no diaper 👖 That's funny 😂 hahahaha 😂😂 Oopsie 🙈 Poopy underwear now 💩💩 hehehehe 😂 We want poopies! We want poopies! 💩💩💩 hahahahaha🤣hahhahahhaaa🤣 Poo💩 *cough* POO!😆😆😆😆😆😆😆💩💩💩💩💩💩💩


IfuckedACrab

Reading this makes me want to lobotomize myself.


oliverjoy69420

I'm glad one of us read it. I just copy pasta'd it after reading 'stinky', to the chagrin of everyone, I guess.


Ninebun

Did I just read it will Skeleton voice? Even with the laugh 😂


Ok_notSquare

Skeletor never fails


abhigoswami18

Or trim it maybe a little


ifoundit1

HA!